初中英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)短文大全
在人們的日常生活及交往當(dāng)中，笑話(huà)無(wú)處不在。笑話(huà)是人類(lèi)特有的能力和交際工具。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理了初中英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)短文，歡迎閱讀!
初中英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)短文：Marriage
A woman is in bed with her lover, who also happens to be her husband’s best friend. They make love for hours, and afterwards, while they’re just lying there, the phone rings. Since it’s the woman’s house, she picks up the receiver.
Her lover looks over at her and listens, only hearing her side of the conversation. “Hello? Oh, hi. I’m so glad that you called. Really? That’s wonderful. I am so happy for you. That soundsterrific. Great! Thanks. Okay. Bye, bye.” She hangs up the phone and her lover asks, “Who was that?” “Oh” she replies, “That was my husband telling me all about the wonderful time he’s having on his fishing trip with YOU!”
初中英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)短文：Playing Octopus
This guy walks into a bar near a concert hall with an octopus under his arm and says, "I'll bet any of you that my octopus can play any instrument that you give him."
Two guys bet fifty dollars each that the octopus can't play their instruments.
The first guy hands over his French horn and the octopus starts to play it.
The second guy hands over his tuba and sure enough the octopus starts to play it.
The bartender then walks into the back room and comes back five minutes later with a set ofbagpipes and bets all the money in the drawer that the octopus wouldn't be able to play it. He hands over the bagpipes to the octopus and waits.
After about a minute of watching the octopus run its tentacles over the bagpipe the owner of the octopus says, "Come on now! Play it!"
The octopus replies, "What do you mean play it?! If I can figure out how to get the plaidpajamas off of it, I'm gonna screw it!"
初中英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)短文：Talking on the Telephone
Each Sunday the minister called the children to the front of the church while he told them a story. Once he brought a telephone to better illustrate the idea of prayer.
"You talk to people on the telephone and don't see them on the other end of the line, right?" he began.
The children nodded yes. "Well, talking to God is like talking on the telephone. He's on the other end, but you can't see him.
He is listening though."Just then a little boy piped up and asked, "What's his number?"
初中英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)短文：Skunk
"We have a skunk in the basement," shrieked the caller to the police dispatcher. "How can we get it out?"
"Take some bread crumbs," said the dispatcher, "and put down a trail from the basement out to the back yard. Then leave the cellar door open."
Sometime later the resident called back. "Did you get rid of it?" asked the dispatcher.
"No," replied the caller. "Now I have two skunks in there!"
臭 鼬
“我們的地下室里有一只臭鼬，”打電話(huà)的人對(duì)警察調(diào)度員尖叫道。“我們?cè)鯓硬拍馨阉鰜?lái)?”
“弄一些面包屑，”調(diào)度員說(shuō)，“從地下室往外鋪一條小道直到后院。然后將地下室的門(mén)打開(kāi)。”
一段時(shí)間后，那位居民又將電話(huà)打了回來(lái)。“你們將它弄出來(lái)了嗎?”調(diào)度員問(wèn)。
“沒(méi)有，”打電話(huà)的人答道，“現(xiàn)在那兒有兩只臭鼬了。”
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